Someone recently asked me a question I’ve heard in different forms throughout my career: How do you watch so much porn?
Their confusion made perfect sense. For them, watching porn followed a pretty straightforward trajectory. Find something hot. Get turned on. Masturbate. Cum. Close the browser.
End of experience.
If that were how I approached pornography, I probably couldn’t watch nearly as much of it as I do either.
The difference is a mindset.
Porn, for me, isn’t fundamentally about masturbation or orgasm. Those things can certainly be part of the experience, and I’m not interested in stripping pornography of its sexual purpose. Sex is the medium. Arousal matters.
But it isn’t the only thing I’m there for.
When I sit down to watch porn, I’m also watching performance. I’m looking at creativity. I’m studying sex. I’m noticing bodies, movement, chemistry, technique, cinematography, personalities, directing choices, and all the tiny decisions that determine whether a scene becomes forgettable or extraordinary.
Sometimes I’m watching how a performer gives a blowjob. Sometimes I’m fascinated by the way someone positions her body during penetration so that both her partner and the camera get exactly what they need. Sometimes it’s the physical choreography of a threesome or double penetration that catches my attention. Other times I’m watching a director construct an entire sexual fantasy through lighting, editing, wardrobe, location, and pacing.
And sometimes somebody simply gets fucked in a way that makes me stop and appreciate just how beautiful sex can look on camera.
That kind of watching doesn’t have an obvious finish line.
An orgasm might conclude masturbation, but it doesn’t conclude curiosity.
That distinction probably explains more about my relationship with pornography than almost anything else.
Over the years, I’ve learned to approach porn the way I approach music, film, books, or any other creative medium I care deeply about. I want to understand why something works. I want to recognize styles. I want to follow artists across their careers. I want to discover things I haven’t seen before and reconsider things I thought I already understood.
Pornography also provides an extraordinary opportunity for sexual study.
Watch closely enough, and you encounter an enormous vocabulary of sexual expression. Different bodies move differently. Performers communicate differently. Techniques vary. Desires vary. What looks incredible with one pairing might fall completely flat with another.
There is always something to observe.
And that, ultimately, is how I can watch so much porn without feeling like I’ve had enough once somebody cums, whether it’s a performer onscreen or me sitting in front of it.
I’m not simply waiting for the orgasm.
I’m exploring the art.
And I’d encourage other porn fans to try doing the same.
The next time you put on a scene, don’t make cumming the finish line. Stay with it. Watch the performers. Notice the choices they’re making. Pay attention to the camera, the chemistry, the technique, the rhythm, and the countless little details you might normally blow past.
Then watch another scene.
Explore a performer you’ve never seen before. Follow a director. Revisit an old favorite. Try a genre outside your usual rotation. Permit yourself to be curious about pornography instead of merely consuming it until you get off.
Watch more porn, but watch it differently.
The more attention you give it, the more pornography has to give back.
